...

Do you believe me when I look you in the face, and lie through my teeth? The strangers on the street can see through the words I say, why can't you? One of these days I'll have the guts to say it.

H.

...

I think, if you really knew me... you wouldn't need to read this blog. [and you know this already]

H.

...

You've got but one thing wrong though, I tried to make her stay, but it seemed nothing I could say would prevent her from leaving. And I have a fair idea it had nothing to do with you.

She doesn't see why you're writing those words. But then, I'd have thought it obvious. The pretence of the initial encouter even specified; 'you know, this is where you're obliged to take his side, I'm not going to hold it against you.' 

hmm. It seems I was a bit behind in melodramatic reading myself.

H.


b = 0

...

people always end up finding out, always.


H.

...


YOU ARE AWESOME.in every sense of the word.


H.

...

you know what? I have my cake; and I'm eating it too.

H.

...

you know what? Life would be so much easier if we didn't have to sleep. :|

H.

...
"I know that I shouldn't let it get to me,
But it does and who am I kidding?"


J.

...

Dear Santa;


Could you please spare one 1997 Toyota Celica, preferably black with a sunroof.


Cheers,

H.


But seriously... I wish I had a car. :|

Let me make this clear, I don't wish I had money to buy a car, because well I've gotten to that stage already. But the effort it takes to find one which you like for the right price that's not an hour drive away just to look at it... oh the effort involved.

...
Today is the 23rd of December. It was rather hot today.

This morning I got up at 7.43am, after previously setting my alarm for 7.20am. This initial 20-minute delay to the start of my day, whilst enjoyable at the time, annoyed me greatly. Hit the coffee machine espresso PRONTO and barista-ed one short mac.  The next 2 hours of my time were spent wrapping the cristmas puddings I had made the day earlier, and gathering all the required items for the exciting events of today. Ensuring adequate supplies for the day ahead is always essential; AND time consuming at such moments of ones morning.

At exactly 9.41am, with the hairstraighter flciked back into the 'off' position, the house was departed and the green car set off down Ferntree Gully Road. With the shiny new red 'P' plate displayed, arrival to number 37 was already 23 minutes behind schedule. Further delaying time, the busy intersection of Mountain HWY and Boroinia Rd, combined with Wantirna Rd provided an extra obstacle when one turns the wrong way TWICE. Several loops around maccas later, number 31 30 36 was reached.

RINGWOOD. BOX HILL. BURWOOD EAST. MOUNT WAVERLEY. MOUNT WAVERLEY. MOUNT WAVERLEY CHADSTONE. CHADSTONE. MOUNT WAVERLEY. OAKLEIGH. CLAYTON. WESTALL. MOUNT WAVERLEY. VERMONT SOUTH. BURWOOD. MOUNT WAVERLEY. CHADSTONE.

So we drove halfway to westall and I gave up, mostly because we ran out of time. Delivered cordz back to her house, then over to lunch, rushed down to nathan, transfered money to a broke paolo, and hit the shops in search of a park. less than 5 minutes looking [and about 4 corrections later] I managed to get 'shiela' into a spot, just.

with minutes to spare, and handy pre-bought tickets, AVATAR. in 3D. Coles escapade whilst waiting for ms Yianis and her forgotten scones, revealed coke 2 for $5.80 and chomp bars 4 for $2. Naturally this sale opportunity couldn't be passed. Turns out than Nathan texted me to get him a drink, so its LUCKY i was being generous and bought one for him anyway... :P

you know what. This is incerdibly boring to type. and the same goes for you to read. I can't believe people I used to write blogs like this...



H.

...

there have been things, written across these days, desperate to appear on this here scene. The will [or lack there of]; the effort- to fix the fixable, prevented more than mere snippets of life every now and again... we steal those fleeting moments in dark corners when we know they are watching, and come daylight pretend its all a dream. Have you woken up yet? the tent's packed up and the lights returned to their boxes; and yet nothing. The day I'd been waiting all year for- came and past like any other day. This disappoints me somewhat. Expectations are funny things, you know. whatever trevor.


The news; [the abridged series.]
- merry 18th to emily/sally/laura/callum/brigid/keiren/james/arman/vicky.
- merry19th to byron.
- happy 25th of December.
- 'there was something written here originally....' [that was important to me, you should have known it so.]
- double standards occur daily.
- today I was Santa. Cordz was my elf/rudolf. even with the red nose I got lost on Boroinia Rd.
- freedom tastes sweeter than you think. [but costs 118.9c/L]
- EDGAR! [I shall post a photo when I have one acceptable.]
- I decided my future.
- I decided.
- Can you even decide something like that?
- 17th - 8.78am / 5.45pm
- 18th - 6.98am / 2.32pm
- 19th - 2.12am / 1.85pm
- 20th - 5.00am/pm
- 21th - 2.12am / 8.75 pm


in a while crocodile.


H.


PS. I told you so.
PS. I told you so.
PS. I told you so.
PS. I told you so.
PS. I told you so.
PS. I told you so.
PS. I told you so.
PS. I told you so.
PS. I told you so.
PS. I told you so.

...

Funny moment of yesterday;


22/12/2009 10:53 pm - Chadstone Shopping Centre [Peter Alexander]


First time I've ever been into this particular store; and I had no clue what I was looking at [xmas shopping you see]...

*stands near pile of assorted tank tops looking for a Medium size*


Ben [wearing boardies and a random Tee]: You know what... I think I'll wait outside... I feel awkward standing in here... at least you're dressed like you'd shop in here!
Harry: Fine whatever...
Random Customer: Excuse me.. but I was just looking for thi...
Harry: Oh, sorry.. I don't actually work here...
Random Customer: Oh.. er.. sorry..






so wearing jeans a shirt and thongs make you look like you work in a pyjamas store now...


H.

Why is the line for dessert at a buffet restaurant always the longest?

One night and one more time, thanks for the memories.

Oh btw, i never got around to making a pineapple costume.

...

and when you sigh like that... you make it sound like the world's coming to an end...


The day's reflection upon what should have been, served no purpose but to delve further into life's mysteries. When those rare dreams surface; depicting an ugly separation from the path of what's commonly known, is it perhaps then, not a nightmare; but a sign of something which must be done?

I say the words I do; and despite being true to their meaning; the full picture is often not completely conveyed- if at all. You say to me those throwaway lines about happiness, and yet, they're still just that; throwaway lines. I tried once upon a time, to make things right; happy; the way it should be, only to discover the pointlessness of it all.

and maybe it is...

A fickle fortune you may well say; but one I brought upon myself. To deny the truth of the realms below is simply the naivety shining through your sentences. Stop. Read no further. Or do.

You know; of all the people to sit there; crying down that crossed line; about what they wished the world to be, your problems are the least trivial of them all. I get you- then and now. Maybe you don't see it, you can't be blamed, but take a long hard look at me; and you'd see yourself sitting there staring back.


the lights are going off in this room; and in my head.

H.

...

'You have qualified for the VCE'

I know they say this is not supposed to decide the rest of my life... but yeah. disappointment is kind of overwhelming right about now. Its not as if I can say I gave my all... because you know that I didn't.

27 + 27 + 32 + 32 + 33 + 34 = 86.60


Do not tell me this isn't bad. Do not say it doesn't matter. This matters to me.

You know whats kinda annoying, it turns out that I didn't do that badly in Spesh and/or Japanese, raw studies of 27 for both, and yet English seems my downfall at just 34, despite average all year. :| So essentially I ended up with 6 out of 6 subjects in the thirties, which isn't so much of a problem, but if you look at the maths side of things, I could really have done one less subject, focused all that time on another, and gotten a better in result. But then, that assumes that I'm even capable of that.

You know whats even better? Remember Methods; that subject last year which I thought I did horribly in... well that came in at number 2 spot [right after the compulsory english] followed closely by chemistry, Japanese [YES I KNOW RIGHT... IN MY PRIMARY FOUR!?] with extras as Specialist and Cert 3. And now I hear you say; What about that economics? didn't even get a mention.

Well hello Ballarat.

H.


PS. you can start judging me now.

...
"I love how we're back where we started..."





J.

...
keywords: with care.

keywords: DO NOT.




J.

...
why?

I wish I had answers.





J.

...

You know what?... actually no. never mind. its not like you'd care anyway.


[This is the spot where I would have uploaded some thoughtful photograph, if I could have been bothered showing it to you...]

H.

...

If the muffled instructions, strategic silences and seemingly pointless negotiations are anything to go by, it looks like war has been declared. Somehow, the line between here and the end still escapes me.

I can't tell which side is winning, either.
Right now, it looks like we're destined to be losers, caught in a forever of vying for justification truth validation.

Twenty-six minutes to fix things.
It's times like these I wonder if miracles do happen.
It was supposed to be a compromise.
Instead it made us weak.

Would you rather die or admit you were wrong?

Fuck this. I'm sick of it. I'm out of things to say.

It's about as reckless as CRASH CRASH.

Eight.
I guess this is where we part then. (who?)



J.


4 minutes is all you need to save the world, or that's what they'd have us believe anyway.

H.


Saving the world and trying to stop it from crashing into you are two very different things. One unlikely, the other inevitable.

J.

...

So I'm somehow homeless walking along the streets of Mt Waverley, when I steal an electric saucepan [yeah i dunno what they are either] from Retrovision, in which I managed to heat up left-over spaghetti sauce [which I got from who knows where] behind a football stadium [despite the fact I didn't plug it in] in which they played American Football but with food [once again, no idea how this would work], all under the direction from India. After which we decided to go to an almost identical stadium in Oakleigh, which played the same game, but with desert instead...

Yeah I'm cool.

H.

...



H.

We all have those quiet places, to sit and think about the man in the sky.

H.

...









trains and solving machines....


you won't catch me around here...


H.

...



H.

Fact of today: turning off the light doesn't render shadows non-existent; it merely makes them that much harder to see.

Although, sometimes the only solution is to fool ourselves.


J.

...

relax.

H.

...

damn.
I did it again.
The scenic railway is clattering around the tracks once more.
How delightful.
Don't forget to smile for the photograph.

H.

...

PS. Letter-writing is cool. 

H.

...


why does life always end with all your worldly possessions written on a bit of paper; mailed to the people you used to know, for them to fight over who gets what?

You may achieve greatness in life; but once you die, well you're dead- so who cares anyway? And if that greatness conflicts, and what they say is true, well it may just have consequences anyway.

Who invented the Condom? Well I shouldn't think Mr(s). Condom would be veiwed too highly in the eyes of HIM and the church, and yet he/she has saved countless from the plague of AIDS and the barrage of other STI's.

Yeah that's right; I'm talking about a contraceptive, AND this is not awkward.

But seriously...?

H.

...

Answer;

a) 15 Years.
b) 15 Months
c) 15 Weeks
e)15 Days
f)15 Hours



H.

...

Do you read between the lines of everything I say too? Maybe you should someday; it may just prove insightful.

H.

...
Here I sit upon this chair,
all bound up in thoughts of dispair.
But the message came and went,
these young fragile lives; already spent.

When the clocks rang out,
and the longing turned to a shout,
those 25 cent pockets of gold,
keep grasp of dear hearts they hold.

The wheels gound down those tired old tracks,
laden with bags of full yellow sacks,
the blue realms down down below,
where treacherous thoughts did sew.

and the day, fresh once more,
held little more to settle such score,
the insanity of all it is,
yields little than this short quiz,

and here we are, this chair again;
thinking about the moment when,
my world will crash and burn once more,
and see everything tumbling to the ground.


H.

...
Is there anyone out there who is listening?

The point of these words has quickly escaped, leading to the realisation that the worth of writing probably isn't sufficient anyway.

The truth didn't work, so lies were the only answer. Such is life; always.


H.

There is a reason why I love now. And you should know by now why.

...



when is silence awkward? the strangest thing; it was, and then it wasn't. You're supposed to be the one with whom all awkwardness as gone, and yet it came back.

AND YOU!? why is it not so, when it seriously should be.


H.


PS typing with one hand is way cool.

...

welcome to the yes time club.

H.

...

Can you please just take this short moment, while reading this, to reflect on the ingenuity of RSS, and the wonders it brings.

Possibly the best thing since sliced bread. That cliché is so too overused.

H.

...

You say you feel out of place. You say you feel self-conscious. You wonder if you'll be the only one.

Have you though, considered that, that person might just [also] be me.

Your fear is understandable, but try for one moment, to experience that, everyday.

I remember the time, when it was one in one hundred. Now, here at least, it seems the tables have been turned. So when you venture down that road, just think to yourself, returning provides the same hurdles for me.

H.

...

This is how I spend most nights these days..





H.

...

Looks like I didn't get the job at Myer. :|

So for now I'm stuck at Maccas... and to be honest; I'm not sure how much longer I can last. 8 hours today nearly killed me- and all for less than $80. Yeah that's right; I get paid $9.78 and hour.

Shoutout; If your employer wants a willing and able employee mention me yeah?

But for now; its just fingers crossed that someone pulls out at Chadstone Myer; OR they decide they need more people...

H.

Welcome to the reality: I'm your worst nightmare.

H.

...

Seventeen. Eighteen. 


But a year difference; and yet, miles apart. Though even then; 18 to some means nothing. The realisation that I act 3 years older than I am set in sometime ago, and so I apologise. Mostly for forgetting you act your age, and I don't. 

H.

...

Warning; malice intended.


Awkward? Was it? I hadn't noticed.



H.

Today's outlook: mostly sunny with a good chance of rain

The rain came down and flushed the scene. The water poured across the landscape, washing the grit and grime from every corner. And of course, the morning after the night before is left with the serene feeling of cleansing.

Those taking long walks along beaches at 6 in the morning all have the same troubled faces.

But then, the writing's already on the wall. And if you knew well enough reading the wall would be unnecessary.

Sometimes I hate myself.

The end.

Thats what your hoping for anyway.

This is where I had the explanation, but figured you wouldn't like what i'd have written.

I searched the usual haunts for the people I know, but somehow they always seemed to evade me. This bright world with its sinister innocent appearance is beyond the realms of being dealt with.

The words are rarely said, but then, they rarely need to be. Polite people always try to be polite, but somewhere along the lines, the halfhearted attempt can be seen through.

That false sleep shone through again. Was I supposed to not pretend and let the true colours shine?

Escape. Help. Now.

ps. I miss you.

We all have our pride at stake, bonded to the fact that walls of quaint old houses are paper thin. News travels fast around these small towns, and although the family size has doubled for the next week, the vast expanse leaves enough room for those loneliness birds to settle.

The gunn rang out across the hall, the silence ensued, and the niceties were swept under the carpet. When the prodigal son returned only to be greated with sarcasmic undertones about lost time and opportunity, the son might have well just never looked back.

A week in context is but anything but a short time. The wedge between our fractured friendships has never been driven deeper.

Sometimes a feigned sleep is the only answer to anything.

...

The whirling catastrophic world, continued down the path of utter destruction, until the day, when that short man said; 'enough'.


You know; ending school really isn't all that great. Oh don't get me wrong; the fact I don't have to go any more is simply amazing, but I guess I half expected myself to be more pleased?

In the meantime, drowning my sorrows, has more or less involved the same old things [and of course those few exceptions].

The same old Saga almost lived to see another day, just like the cockroach, it may never die.
The new shoes, enabled the constant beeping, the levels of exhaustion [circa 6.5] and the thirst for more.
Last minute running, to make unscheduled appointments and for the buying of a shimmering skin.
The 6.20am wakeup call; with all that frustration [and the side of bacon].
The end of the world, depicted with a happy ending.
The midnight madness as the twilight diminishes, and the new moon dawns.
The transfer; Specialist chemicals with a dash of desirable headphones in the office.


Bauhause, Jeanswest, 1ten1, Jag Jeans, Hoyts, Boost, Nandos, Coles, Springfield, Myer.

H.

...

The End

H.

...



H.

I think i was/am wrong. When the roof was blown away by the unexpected, new light was let fall upon the situation.
But what about the rest? Discard the previous assumptions based on this? And what about the past? Surely some wisdom is to be gained?

... And there they stood, marooned, with no escape. Desperate to avoid its stare, they hid behind everything. The advert for the new insurance, the lightpole, even the glass window its self.

Unrelenting, ceaseless, it bore down apon those stranded soles, untill the white angel rounded the corner, delivering them not only relief, but home too.

...

oh and don't forget about Christmas. December 24th FYI.

H.

...

midnight smoothies and runaway phone calls. We are? We are the waiting. Message. Smile. Message. Laugh. Message. Tear. The air; thick with the regret of a day wasted; blamed on the incandescent heat, radiating from our earth's good sole.


LEMON overload.


Chemical actions, resulting reactions, with checked questions in multiple points. Time passes; and with it gains the new perspective, and change. For the better? ...no. But superficial views should not be judged upon lightly; though they always, and will always do.


Postage stamps with yellow packaging; the midnight run too steep and able for the most willing.

H.

...

So I've spent a good hour sorting the 'my picutres' folder on my computer, fun times. Hundreds of random screenshots; 12000 photos, with another 800 from my phone, and an assortment of digitally altered bits and pieces later its almost resembling an some sort of order. In amongst it all I found this, which somewhat amused me....




H.

...

This crazy; mad world reveals nothing to the non-believer. Those speeding cars; passing by without the care of existence; their only aim to reach the end. The end of their journey, and so began a love affair with words.


H.

...

Sorry for offending you.

H.

...
referring to both Q and A, and lateline tonight.


Call me naive sitting here in my modern[ish] Australian house, but these scare tactics about the 'population explosion' really aren't having the intended effect.

So they reckon in 20 years [2030] there'll be 9000000000 people living on this earth, demanding 50% more food and energy and 30% more fresh water.

Sounds scary, but that is 20 years away? We have a lot of time to change, and I guess I have faith that we will?

Though, Australia does have a fertility rate of only about 2.3 so really, we only gain .3 of a person every generation.

Hmm. Maybe we should be scared; but hey use a condom.

Which brings about another layer to this issue. Shoot-me, but sometimes I wonder why they make the pope out to be all that he is.

Don't use condom's he says; they cause aids.
Don't have abortion; thats killing babies.

The second, yes its true[I really don't know where I stand on this...], but the first; how fucking warped can you be? Moreover, how can you third-world-followers of his word be so literal in your understanding that you'd be dead against using any sort of contraceptive, when apparently sex before marriage; and therefore babies; hence the skyrocketing global population, is no worries to you.

So you think I'm lying? Like I said; our birthrate is around 2.3; the same for most western countries. China, Japan, Russia; well indeed most of old Europe has DECLINING populations. So who are having all these babies then?



I don't mean to Judge religion; or anything of the sort. It just quite astounds the inner scientific person I am.



H.

...


IN breaking news! The RBA has again announced a rate rise of 25 basis points..



So you know those Industry Superfund- superannuation television ads?

Their tagline; 'run only to benefit members' , while maybe true, does ask some obvious questions.

If these funds don't pay commissions to financial advisors, and are virtually non-profit organisations, with their sole interest to produce the largest growth of your capital, why do they feel the need to promote themselves? Surely there isn't any profit motive in recruiting a larger contributor base?

In other more pressing economic news; The 90 per cent tax on goldfish companies was abolished by the treasurer who is an enthusiastic but secret collector of goldfish. Or so says my economic text.


H.

"From Now On We Are Enemies"


'I just want to be better than your head's only medicine'
A downward spiral just a pirouette
Getting worse til there's nothing left
What good comes of something when I'm just the ghost of nothing?
'I'm just the man on the balcony singing':
"Nobody will ever remember me,"
Rejoice, rejoice and fall to your knees
(for a)
Lunatic of a god or a god of a lunatic?
Oh, their faces are dancing
They're dancing til
Til they can't stand it
A composer but never composed
Singing the symphonies of the overdosed
A composer but never composed
'Singing':
"I only want what I can't have"
'Heralded as a king before I had a birthday
With double digits
Fit the crown to my head but I was only a kid'
'I'm just the man on the balcony singing':
"Nobody will ever remember me,"
Rejoice, rejoice and fall to your knees
(for a)
Lunatic of a god or a god of a lunatic?
Oh, their faces are dancing
They're dancing til
Til they can't stand it
A composer but never composed
Singing the symphonies of the overdosed
A composer but never composed
'Singing':
"I only want what I can't have"
'I just want to be better than your head's only medicine'
'I'm just the man on the balcony singing':
"Nobody will ever remember me,"
Rejoice, rejoice and fall to your knees
(for a)
Lunatic of a god or a god of a lunatic?
Oh, their faces are dancing
They're dancing til
Til they can't stand it
A composer but never composed
Singing the symphonies of the overdosed
A composer but never composed
'Singing'
"I only want what I can't have"

...

Tell me; when you _ _ _ _ me. It's nice to know when the time comes, because you know... ultimately its inevitable. 


Do you share my reality or am I just applying mine to your situation? Imagine the world where we share identical circumstance. Would war be eradicated? Would the world be a 'happy' place? How could anyone fight? We'd all understand each other?


But then, where would the uniqueness go? Every human, the same. Like a new housing estate, the number of bedrooms might change, the colour scheme of the front door even, but ultimately the same.

DARE! to be different I say! Bring upon the world; the wrath of your opinion. Unrest, it may well bring, but be bold.

H.

...

Halloween specials... well any holiday special edition of anything.
Daytime TV. mind-numbing boredom which you just can't help but watch. Kerry-Ann? Oprah? Ready Steady Cook? Judge Judy?
The Video Store phenomenon. Spend 20 minutes deciding what to borrow, only to see something better as you walk out the door, only just having borrowed some mediocre American comedy.
The awkwidity. when does it cease to become awkward to call someone's landline, and risk the chance of halving to talk to your friends siblings; or parents.

how about the superficial things?
WHY IS THERE NEVER ENOUGH COAT HANGERS!?
WHY ARE MY WHITE SHOES NEVER WHITE?
WHY CAN'T I SLEEP BEFORE midnight.
WHY DO I ALWAYS PURSUE THE IMPOSSIBLE.
WHY DOES MY PHONE BATTERY ONLY LAST 3 'YES'CALLS?
WHY CAN'T I BE A SILVER REWARDS MEMBER TOO?
WHY CAN'T BUYING A CAR BE AS EASY AS BUYING MILK.
WHY DOES BLU-TAC UNSTICK WITH CHANGES IN TEMPERATURE?
WHY DOES THE BUS RUN HOURLY ON A SUNDAY.
WHY DO I CONCERN MYSELF WITH SUCH TRIVIAL THINGS?
WHY CAN'T HAVE MY OWN IKEA BEDROOM.


I'll admit it. Storage turns me on.

Jokes.

But Ikea does rate. [:

H.

...
who is this guy... and why do I care?


The influence @jnttphm and @mornane have had on this blog, is well, doubtless. Think you never know what all these cryptic messages are on about? Welcome to my life.

Alienation and supremacy is not, and never will be the purpose of this blog. You might just find, given the question, that answers are freely available.

H.

...
Retro fashions, and stately issues.
Many borrowed thoughts regarding delightful studies of echoed spaces.
The name now known, that macabre picnic.
Hide and seeking in epic proportions, mailing the comments away.
Extended responses to multiple questions, specialising in distraction, squeaking, and the method of obtaining half-price dim-sims.
The lost scene; the environmental destruction; something about New Zealand and arranged marriages.
3 hours and two seconds. are you alive?
9 hours 7 minutes. are you hungry?
Secretive codes in plain view.
where did the time go?
Three hypothetical Omegos; One Two Three?
what's this place? I'll never know.
Simon > Sam , pr( |Z| < c) = 2a-2; 0 < c < 3,
we had too much time.
toys and fast black cars; sleeking past.
judgeless assumptions; the things of ideal worlds.
too much of anything is too much?
the hour + 1 in the warmth never hurt anyone.
If you really knew; you know it would be something else.
we fought like tomorrow was promised.
Cheese Flour Honey Water Butter Salt GladWrap Envelope + E
Mid way down night road; desolate factories lit-up like Christmas trees, and the elves are in full force too.
RED YELLOW YELLOW RED, recycled thoughts of plastic boxes with wheels,
OPEN said the shop; and the quiet guilt laden many file in through the discrete amber threshold.
The world can see you.
Live.


H.

...

Pictures of you; Pictures of me- remind us all of what could have been.

H.

...

You know what I hate? This;


well hate is rather a strong word, but the blandness of the generic 'meat and three veg' Australian classic is rather overwhelming.

H.

...
I need some critical review.. if you wouldn't mind. :)





word count; 722

H.

...
I'm not sure if you'll agree, but despite my somewhat nostalgic view of Melbourne, in the back of my mind I know its just a city of the many. This is now. What about then?.


Would it surprise you to know, that 35 years after being declared a city by the queen in 1837, it had become the wealthiest in the entire British Empire, and second in population only to London? Population; 1837- 177, 1891- 490,000.  What changed?

• Tullamarine Freeway
• Eastern Freeway
• Southeastern Freeway – now known as the Monash Freeway
• Lower Yarra Freeway – now known as the West Gate Freeway

• Dingley Freeway
• Mornington Peninsula Freeway
• Frankston Freeway
• Greensborough Freeway

• Southern Bypass – now known as CityLink
• Western Bypass – now known as CityLink

• Western Ring Road
• Northern Ring Road – now known as the Metropolitan Ring Road
• Eastern Ring Road – now known as Eastlink

H.

...


1 Banana
250ml Milk
100g Low fat Yoghurt
1TBS coffee.

Blend together.

...



H.

...

So today on twitter I decided to start complaining about my internet, followed 3 hours later by an @reply from my ISP wanting to know if they could fix the problem.

Am I supposed to feel like my privacy is invaded, or grateful that they're offering to help?

Yet another reminder of how public the internet is really becoming. Sure, my twitter account is on public, but it never really occurs to me who might be reading it.

This leads me to think about this. I don't put any PI on this, but then sometimes I feel like I reveal more than what my address or phone number ever could.

H.

...


Have you ever lost your mind finding streets you couldn't find? Have you ever been so scared in your life? Yeah, the town was alive, good luck on no one's side and the trip lasted long, like we were trekking for days.

But I recall, we ran, we ran away. Along the streets in the rain, streets in the rain.You took my hands, we found a place and we got away from them, away from them and our day was based on fantasy, but we never knew.

Oh, I love how we complain. How our stomachs were in pain and the only thing that you could do was call for your Mum. Yeah, we started to shout and we walked on the docks and started flowing away.

All I know, is that we were lost, just trying to find our way back home.I'm a crazy boy just trying to, just trying to, just trying to be someone.

We're trying to be someone, and so I ran, we ran away and we got away from them, away from them. Our day was based on fantasy. But we never knew...


H.

...
If you read, you'll judge.

time. life. choices. snailmail. could. regret. waste. next? favourite. suitable. dressing. family. friEND. guilt. remorse. happiness. façade. illusion. delusion. end. end. end. converse. lost. union. unionised. ion. unionised. francis. 7.11. walking. @xxx.日本語。 会話。明日。友達。終る。memories. forgetting. effort. essential. 51%. 09. 74.25.

you did, didn't you.

H.

...

You know what; I resent the people accusing me of 'adding randoms'  on facebook. Yes thats right; I have 450 friends AND I know every one of them. Get over your jealousy already.

H.

Why must there always be a balance?

Seems like things are good. :) auspicious moment, we actually got to see INSIDE his house. Yeah beat that. :P

but also;

'monash university understands that based on your VTAC application, you wished to undertake study in the field of medicine. We regret to inform you however, that based on your UMAT score, you were unsuccessful in obtaining an interview, and will not be considered for the undergraduate degree. '

when your life plays out some unexpected turns i guess you just have to make the most of it. After all, should you take a dive, and head to the vally, consider the money matters.

...



H.

...

food? that white box in my kitchen.
money? the hole in the wall of the bank.
wealth? the dreaded office.
shelter? number ninety-three; number fifty-six.
education? I hate school.
fun? life is so boring. 
health? braces were a bitch; but at least i have straight teeth now.
family? my parents are so embarrassing. 




food? the bag of mace and the dirty water.
money? is irrelevent. we couldn't use it; even if we had any.
wealth? three goats and one rice paddy.
shelter? the hut has a door now.
education? once a week with fifty others.
fun? I sing with my sister occasionally.
health? grandma says not to drink the dirty water from the creek.
family? my grandma; my sister; myself.




ps; Happy 100. :)

H.

...
Spoiler Alert; The Office [US]


So back in 2006; this new television series began to air on channel ten. Originally an adaptation of a British series of the same name, it follows the someone dull lives of the employees of the Scranton branch of the Dunder Mifflin Paper Company. I remember at the time; it was on at 10-10.30 every Sunday night, when I'm sure I was supposed to be in bed asleep.

This is all however; beside the point. See over the three years I've been watching the show, two of the central characters obviously both enjoyed each others company, yet circumstance always prevented anything from happening. And so week after week; you'd sit there wishing; just wishing that things would work out. Hoping for Jim and Pam.

So it is the continual climax; anguish even, of the three years of torment; wishing it to happen, that what occurred in the last episode [I watched] brought such happiness. I felt so absorbed in the JOY of the show, it was almost surreal. And 42 minutes later I find myself sitting here; writing this blog, wondering why it affected me so much? Like the end of season two; when Pam almost got married to the other guy, and then, in the last five minutes of the entire season....

To be honest; I'd be devastated if they ever got rid of it...

It's well worth investing your time in, in my opinion. Season ONE is currently on loan to @jnttphm, but you can borrow it afterwards.



Do's;

• Have a good time
• Dance when its appropriate.
• Eat Dinner

H.

...

save me from the madness; please.


H.

So I got my SAC back today; A. :) The prompt was a picture of a dog wearing a wig; using the play; 'A Streetcar Named Desire' as stimulus...



Written Explanation;


The context of 'whose reality?' and the more specific visual prompt called for a specific response highlighting the way we can do things, say things, to change the perception of our reality to an outsider, even believing it ourselves, but the underlying core doesn't change. In this specific instance, the visual highlights the fact that no matter how you dress up a dog [ie a wig], it still remains a dog, and this is eventually discovered soon or later. As such I chose a series of blog entries [and online diary of sorts] to enable accurate portrayal of the elements I was attempting to convey.


Obviously written in a modern context, the language use matched accordingly, and also suited a reflective feel common to most diary-type pieces. Audience can be broadly attributed to students studying ASND as it is supposed to appear as a sample teaching aid, and such also has the purpose of providing more insight to students about the context of 'Whose Reality?'

The piece, trying to emulate the main themes of ASND also responded to the context of 'Whose Reality?' by providing the students with the insight of how one's reality can be altered on the surface, for others to see, yet eventually the ruse unravels, and the real circumstance becomes apparent.




 On 04/09/09 Mike wrote;
So I did the inevitable. Something which I'm sure was always coming. I mean still single at 35? For years the nightclubs and bar scenes have yielded no success, which is why I recently decided to go 21st century. Don’t get me wrong, I never envisaged such drastic actions, but these dire circumstances really did warrant it. I joined that dating website everyone seems to be raving about; eleysianfields.com. I’m not sure what is to come of this, but I guess we’ll just have to wait and see. Knowing my luck, I doubt I’ll even get a response from anyone. Is it really so much to ask for a little companionship? Could life not get that little bit more enjoyable if I could just find someone to share it with?

On 12/09/09 Mike wrote;
One whole week. 7 days. 168 hours. I’ve waited, and yet nothing. Perhaps this foolish futile search for ‘the one’ is just not meant to be. Why do I put myself in these vulnerable situations, whin I know that at the end of the day rejection is inevitable? It hasn’t happened in the last 35 years, why should I have thought it would in the last week? The promise of taking a ride of desire through ‘Eleysian Fields’ is simply unjustified. It appears instead, that as with everything else in my pathetic life I shall be taking that trip to the cemetery alone. I think I’ve just pinned my hopes all too much on this virtual reality, when I knew it was destined to fail.

On 13/09/09 Mike wrote;
Perhaps I wrote that last blog a bit prematurely. It seems there may be some hope after all; Belinda. I don’t know much, but what I do, is her profile picture is mighty fine. I’ll admit things are in the preliminary stages, but she sure seems keen. It was suggested we meet? But I’m still not sure. Can I afford to be let down once again; put my heart on the line, only for it to be snatched up and spat out when I get old or boring or just not new? For now I shall take the precautionary steps and keep it virtual. I mean I’ve waited this long, what’s a few more days going to change?

On 14/09/09 Mike wrote;
I gave into temptation. Shoot me. What was I supposed to do? Just let an obviously interested woman slip though my fingers? I don’t think so! Besides, she’s only 29 and apparently grew up in those leafy suburbs we all hear about. What sane Altona man would actually pass this opportunity up? Not me, that’s for sure. We’re meeting at some bar in the city; she prefers the night life evidentially. Does it make me sound desperate if I say I can see myself with her? Well maybe I am then, but who isn’t these days anyway?

On 16/09/09 Mike wrote;
One word; amazing. How one woman can encompass everything I’ve been searching for I shall never know? From her radiant beauty, even in the dim light, to her obviously educated brain, there simply just isn’t anything to not like! How she hasn’t already been found and wed I shall never know? Obviously we’ve arranged to meet again. Huh! I would never have thought something so easy as joining some stupid website would bring so much happiness, fulfilment and overall joy in my life. Oh how I’ve missed that person to share things with; the being to share all your secrets to. I’m not sure about love at first sight, but Belinda Douglas, you sure do come close. How have I lived this long without you is a complete mystery to me.

 On 24/09/09 Mike wrote;
I remember the complete negativity of my attitude towards anything before I found her, and now it seems the same. How could I have let the vary precautions I created for myself be discarded so easily? Had I not learnt hard enough the last time? The blinding naivety of new found love, or lust, whichever it may be, seems to override everything. I blame human nature. Isn’t it only natural to take things at face value? To believe what you see? What you hear? But when push comes to shove, my idiotic faith in everything I read online, on her profile, is my own burden to bear. Grew up in Toorak? Sure. Only 29? Right. Have a high standard of morality? Sure.
 See I have a friend; a friend with questionable interests. Now these interests are not the topic of concern however, more worrying is the fact he recognised her, or more rather where from. See apparently there’s this men’s club called the ‘Tarantula Arms’, whose star performer went by the name of ‘Miss Bella’. Need I say more? Evidentially Mummy and Daddy lost the house in the financial crisis and wouldn’t pay her ‘allowance’ anymore. And so the poor old girl had to find a way to fund those shopping sprees somehow. I guess no matter what you say, you can’t change who you are or what you’ve done. As that saying goes; a dressed up dog, is still just a dog.


Not very interesting, most vague and pointless, yet still recieved an 'A'? Sometimes I wonder whether AND is all there? But hey, I'm not going to argue with the result. At least it seems there's one subject left with a respectable average.

H.

...


I'm waking up at the start of the end of the world but its feeling just like every other morning before and now I wonder what my life is going to mean if it's gone? The cars are moving like a half a mile an hour if that, and I started staring at the passengers who're waving goodbye. Can you tell me what was ever really special about me all this time?

I believe the world is burning to the ground, oh well i guess we're gonna find out how far we've come. Well I believe it all is coming to an end. Oh well, I guess we're gonna pretend, let's see how far we've come.

I think it turned ten o'clock but i don't really know, then I can't remember caring for an hour or so. Started crying and I couldn't stop myself, I started running but there's no where to run to. I sat down on the street and took a look at myself and said where you going man you know the world is headed for hell; say your goodbyes if you've got someone you can say goodbye to.

Its gone gone, its all gone. There is no one on the corner and there's no one at home. It was cool cool, it was just all cool, now it's over for me and it's over for you.


Pay my respects to grace and virtue, send my condolences to good. Hear my regards to soul and romance they always did the best they could. Will your system be alright when you dream of home tonight? There is no message I'm receiving; let me know, is your heart still beating?

Are we human or are we denser? My sign is vital, my hands are cold and I'm on my knees looking for the answer; are we human or are we denser?




H.

...
Watch out Monday; I'm coming.

H.

...





H.

Just quietly, why am I so annoyed? Is it because I'm jealous, or do I genuinely dislike the situation? Jealousy; I'm sure of it. Where is this path taking me anyway? I can see the spirality, looping and looping, but the end? Where shalt thou be?   

...
Do you think I didn't notice?
When the glove is worn, and the pastry is broken fast, the rapid dissapearance causes the strangest things, but then the snail mail was always the best anyway.

H.

Too much of anything is too much

Too much love can be too much

We had too much time

Too much us

So we fought like tomorrow was promised

H.

'write a 2000-3000 summary of the relevance of the film 'Vantage Point' to the ideas of the context; Whose Reality.'

The movie ‘vantage point’, was a stupid waste of my precious time. I do not appreciate wasting a solid hour and a half of my pre-exam preparation time watching such mindless dribble, and hence I did not feel the need to waste yet more of my study time writing 3000 words about the movie and how it relates to ‘whose reality’, when the link is stretched beyond all means, that ultimately it would take that many words to accurately convey it.




Do you think thats an acceptable response? I mean I know its a little short of the wordcount and all....
H.

It’s just text book stuff
It’s in the ABC of growing up
Now, now, darlin’
Oh don’t kill yourself
'Cause none of us were angels
And you know I love you, yeh

Is it sad to say I'm in love with Imogen Heap? You should totally check her out. Yeah thats right, dog-whistle and all. But seriously, go to that record store and buy yourself 'Good Night and Go'. Its a single and you still get TWO whole songs. Now thats value!

H.

Presenter: 'Who wrote Beethoven's 5th symphony?'
Beauty; 'eerr... John Farnham?'

These are but words on a page. Nothing more, nothing less. LIE.

So they might be more than just words on a page, but I'm not entirely sure they convey the truth.

Embroidering is rather all to easy when you're not staring into the eyes of a friend holiding you accountable.

For Future Reference; take all the emotion in this blog's text, take the 2nd root, and perhaps you might be somewhere near the mark of the actual feeling.

If only life had an undo command. I'd control-Z back to last month.

P.S can't wait till monday. Nothing to do with school.

maybe the time was all wasted? But i had fun anyway.

One by one, they all shuffle off into the distance. Step after step, further away, waiting for that day, for which the return ticket will be validated. Sam, Simon, Edward, Terrance, Frank, Francis, Charlie, Marco, Requiem. The names we gave, in desperate attempts to fool ourselves into believing we have friends. The friends we used to have, once upon a time.

But when the day came and went, the crowed 'oohed' and 'ahhed', and bell tolled its final chime, that dust settled to make it known; the desolation. That lonely figure standing in the vastness of nothing, alone.

Hindsight; the all-knowing wisdom of this world. If only...

The saga began a long long time ago, in a world far far away, the troubled mind to which first bore witness, has long accepted that fate its been dealt; it's just textbook stuff- it's the A-B-C of growing up. This time will be long remembered. It has seen the end of this, and will soon see the end of the everything fighting? It's ok by me, it was a long time ago. Speeding cars. Paused games of life. Say goodnight and go? Maybe. Though we both know, that's not really good for the show.

Where are we? What the hell is going on? The dust has only just began to fall; crop circles in the carpet. Sinking feeling. This can't be happening. When busy streets; a mess with people would stop to hold their heads heavy; hide and seek.

The sweeping insensitivity of this, still alive. Blood and tears, they were here first. That you only meant well? Of course you did. Its all for the best? Of course it is. Ransom notes keep falling out my mouth, newspaper cut-outs. hide and seek. You don't care a bit.

I've been here before; I've seen this room, I've walked this floor. It's cold and its broken. Whats really going on below the surface? Now we never show that.

People change. This is me now. I wasn't going to wait for you. Deal with it me.
Please.