[this appeared on my payslip this week... lol]

ATTENTION ALL EMPLOYEES:
REGARDING H1W1 (SWINE FLU)
AS YOU ARE NO DOUBT ALL AWARE
THE OUTBREAK OF H1W1 IS
SPREADING AND SOME SCHOOLS
HAVE BEEN SHUT DOWN. WHILE WE
HAVE NO CONFIRMED CASES OF
SWINE FLU WITHIN ANY OF OUR
STORES WE HAVE HAD EMPLOYEES
CALL IN SICK OVER THE WEEKEND
WITH FLU LIKE SYMPTOMS. TO
REDUCE THE RISK OF ANY OF OUR
EMPLOYEES CONTRACTING ANY FLU
WE ASK YOU TO YOUR RESTAURANT
MANAGER DIRECT IF YOU HAVE ANY
FLU LIKE SYMPTOMS. ANYONE WHO
HAS FLU LIKE SYMPTOMS WILL NOT
BE ABLE TO RETURN TO WORK
WITHOUT THE ALL CLEAR IN THE
FORM OF A MEDICAL CERTIFICATE.
THANKS PAUL KELLY