If only it was always this obvious.

sometimes this blog feels like its just for you. the conversation we can't have. but still do. like the criptic twitter messages sent, which you didn't get, these words mostly mean nothing [to you]. this does not refer to you. you think its you, but it really isn't.

Did you notice? I tried. [and failed]. the goodbye-less departure, from me, from there, and here. the line was crossed last summer, but slowly we're working our way back. or maybe that line's just being moved?

like a freshly cooked french fry, its great at first, and even better a minute later. but 3 minutes down the track, you're left with a salty mush of potatoe, drinking anything to flush it out of your system.

like a cat and a magpie, the chase is on form the beginning, the magpie out-manouvering the cat, until it sneaks up behind; JUMPS!, grabs, devours, and wins by 70-odd points.

8.09am. Fuck. Late. Shower. Hair. Run. 623. 8:44am. school. Spesh. UG. fail. question 4. markless. breakfast. Shim. Pancakes. Bacon. Eggs. IGA. Snakes. Japanese. Listening. Natori and his obento business. washitsu. hangman. fail. 46-letter alphabet. lunch. val tick. revision book. careers. CSP BONDED. Economics. Arrow table. Hangman. MICROECONOMIC REFORM. finish. morris. question four, marked. UGE. :):). PASS. The rebellion Begins. HP. print. poster print. glue. yearbook. memory stick. forgotten. bus. missed. 4.23. caught. 4.54 home. schoolies. BAD. ring. BAD. look. BAD. ring. Jaz. Movies. Plans. Shower. Straightener. Clothes. Shoes. RUN. Oakleigh. 4 min. Flinders Direct. 6.27pm. Red White Black Red Blue Red White Black Red White Black. Southgate. La Camera. Fettucini al pollo scilliana. Gnocchi alla napoli. Lemon. Lime. Bitters. Vodka Citron. :).EUREKA! (tower). Lights. Skydeck. 88floor. 38 seconds. 9m/s. MCG. $11. Flinders Stn. Vodaphone. WASTEFUL ENERGY. The Ugly Truth (y). Crown. Choctop. Popcorn. Coke Zero. 96 Min. $14. 8.45pm. E10-E11. Maccas. Cone. Apple Pie. Skinny Latte. Walk. Tram. 86 East Brunswick. Southern Cross. VLINE NOW DEPARTING. Glen waverley train. 9 minutes. Platfrom 10. Flagstaff. Central. Todd&GF. Parliament. Richmond. RED WHITE BLACK RED WHITE BLACK RED WHITE BLACK blue. Sing. Song. Marching. Harmonica. how's xxx? They're fine. still friends with him? yes. Did i just say that? Do i mean that? Yes. Jordie. Home. 12.01 Work. 7am. 6 hours. FUCK.

My undergraduate preferences are:

1. 28251 Medicine/Surgery (Monash University, Clayton, F/T) (Type: CSP)
2. 38051 Biomedicine (University Of Melbourne (The), Parkville, F/T, P/T) (Type:
CSP)
3. 28681 Biomedical Science/Economics (Monash University, Clayton, F/T,
P/T) (Type: CSP)
4. 28161 Biomedical Science (Monash University, Clayton,
F/T, P/T) (Type: CSP)
5. 21721 Biomedical Science (La Trobe University,
Bundoora, F/T, P/T) (Type: CSP)
6. 28371 Economics (Monash University,
Clayton, F/T, P/T) (Type: CSP)
7. 28571 Commerce/Economics (Monash
University, Clayton, F/T, P/T) (Type: CSP)
8. 38101 Commerce (University Of
Melbourne (The), Parkville, F/T, P/T) (Type: CSP)
9. 32821 Economics &
Finance (RMIT University, City, F/T) (Type: CSP)
10. 37041 Biomedical
Science (University Of Ballarat, Mount Helen, F/T, P/T) (Type: CSP)
11. 38271 Science (University Of Melbourne (The), Parkville, F/T, P/T) (Type: CSP)
12. 37401 Commerce (University Of Ballarat, Mount Helen, F/T, P/T) (Type:
CSP)

So I finally decided. :)

Apple -> New Ipod Nano now in 5 New Colours!
MCC -> RE; Finals ticket Allocation
Frontier Touring -> Them Crooked Vultures to tour australia.
Chadstone The Fas...-> Win a New Pair Of SHoes!
... - > ...
Apple -> Ipod Nano. New Features. New Price
Geelong Cats - > Blue &White 14 September 2009
The KellyCo Group - > Payslip
Geelong Cats -> Finals Update


How the words of your existence try to hid themselves amongst the rubbish.
The virtual confrontation.
Doesn't have the same effect now does it?
How about that shouting match we were meant to have?
Tomorrow recess sound good?
When does that term come to relevance? Friendship. How ambiguous.
I take back what I said. We're not friends. [Fingers crossed?]
Take four. lets hope this lasts.


'I just winced on the inside when you said the three of us.'
Don't feel like you need a reason to call me.
It doesn't [always] take 22 minutes .
The method in this mad world, trial, and in the end sleep is the only remedy.


You know what?
I hate that I care so much. Things would be so much easier if I believed what I said to start with. None of this compromise shit.

The starship is coming. How much for a return ticket?


'WTF' when so little can encompass so much.

Welcome, Peter Tan [and you], to the fellowship.

I'm not who you think.

Cord
Jaz
Jan
Indie
Shim
Jam
Nathan
Kat
Ev
F
Even him

These beings make me who i am. The combined wisdom in your collective words shine through the darkness. Always hold me accountable. Never let me forget that.

Made the toast,
Burnt the eggs,
Never got the hang of them,
Just another other day.

Caught the
bus,
Forgot the change,
Looks like I'll be late again,
Hopefully
they won't complain.

My lifes so pitiful,
Give me one good reason
why I shouldn't end it all,
If there's a reason then I haven't found it yet.

And I'll try every drug I find,
Except maybe heroin and cyanide,
But theres a reason I just can't afford it yet.
Oh, its just another
overdose

Went to work,
Saw you there,
But you never seem to
care,
For a single thing I say.

I set the clock and went to sleep,
This anxiety I keep,
Through another fucking day.

(Looks like
that's all today i'm dying)

My lifes so pitiful,
Give me one good
reason why I shouldn't end it all,
If there's a reason then I haven't found
it yet.

And I'll try every drug I find,
Except maybe heroin and
cyanide,
But theres a reason I just can't afford it yet.

Oh, its
just another overdose.

My life's so pitiful..
Pitiful..
Pitiful..
Pitiful..
Pitiful..

My lifes so pitiful,
Give
me one good reason why I shouldn't end it all,
If there's a reason then I
haven't found it yet.

And I'll try every drug I find,
Except maybe
heroin and cyanide,
But there's a reason I just can't afford it yet.

Well my life's so pitiful.

My life's so pitiful.
My life's so
pitiful.
I'm dying.

There is something you should understand. These past 6 months, I always thought that somehow, things might fix themselves. What was that saying? Time heals all? This is where you're expecting me so say that 'now I don't'. But I'm not going to. Something in the back of my mind still wants there to be hope. Life is worthless without it after all. But every little thing, or big thing, makes that hope become less and less a reality, and more an unrealistic perception of this world.

I could act tough, and say I don't care, it didn't hurt, its the premise not the action for which I hold you accountable. Again, I'm not going to, I know you can see through that. But, then the premise, and that eternal 'why?' is always the more important. If that hardest question cannot be overcome, the 'what?' shall be for ever repeated.

Why would you, could you, feel the need to do that? I could even support the argument, if the end justifies the means but I fail to realise what it established. Sure, to get back at me, I get that, but surely then, you would have told me, and felt glee in the anguish that swept across my face. That even sounds like something I would do.

Tell me something, is this better? Do you prefer everyone knowing the intricate details of everything? Drawing attention to me, you, this.

You know me, you know the petty stubborn me. The in the moment person I am. Perhaps I'm over-reacting to life in general. What was it? Being melodramatic. That moment is just so overwhelming, consuming, nothing else but the current skewed objective comes to mind.

This is not what I intended, but life never ends how you want it to anyway. I think its about time we talked. This has gone on long enough. When you're ready, you know where I'll be waiting.

All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places
Worn out faces
Bright and early for the daily races
Going no where
Going no where
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression
No expression
Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrow
No tomorrow
No tomorrow
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles its a very very
Mad world
Mad world
Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday
Happy birthday
And I feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen
Sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me
No one knew me
Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson
Look right through me
Look right through me
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles its a very very
Mad world
Mad world
Enlarging your world
Mad world

This is the real thing
Love changes everything
This is night when every heart's exploding
The real thing
Slow down; it's happening
'Cause you got time to burn
In the heat of the moment
That summer radio
Fireworks off the patio
3 AM, string of green lights in a row
And the real thing
Love can change anything
If you can just let go
Let's go

Boys Like Girls