I'm pretty sure I've mentioned this before, but sometimes I think the day after is almost more enjoyable. Sitting in quiet contemplation, reflecting on the stupid actions, recovering from the night's adventures. Times like these, when all immediate memory seems to be consumed by the fun times makes everything, all this, just seem ok.




H.

You know what, that smile on my face is no indication of feeling. Apart from the fact I'm sick of the way this friendship seems to be working, I'm also sick of you.


H.

For the record though, I maintain my split personality, the divide appearing somewhere near 3030. The quiff and confidence may well be, the insecurity and fear abundant.


H.

 I want to believe that this could be real, that all of this, the lying, the scheming and the cheating could  would eventually amount to something worthwhile. I'm still hopin', but in the mean-time I guess the meander through existence will be enough for entertainment currently.

So here's to the life unexpected, the plan's foiled and the dreams shattered, because expectations are nothing more than worthless attempts to control fate and half-hearted attempts at that.


and on the seventh day, the resolution hast put to dust, the realisation that nothing ever changes trumps all good will.


H.

You know what I don't get though- is why you bothered to invite me in the end anyway?




H.

And i think in my mind, as I hear the shutter whurring and the screen rolls the final credits, why should I care? Because it breaks my heart...

Sometimes I wonder the meaning of all of this...

You know something though, she was right, and so was I. I can't help the way I feel about you. And the worst part is I'm not sure its ever changed. Why someone never woke me up to reality I'll never know... I can't believe it took me this long to realise.

You know what? Fuck you. 'sleep' just happens to be a major part of my life, a third to be exact. So yes, I am going to buy a $55 pair of Peter Alexander pajamas to match the $300 Egyption cotton Sheridan sheets, and you're just going to have to deal with that.

H.

Why does it feel like we haven't spoken in forever?!

Oh, wait, that's because we haven't.

This is the obligatory post. The one, like Christmas which, is full of that holiday cheer we all know and love. Like the year culminating in tonight, this moment right here, seems apt. Ever year, those same old resolutions get wished for, and every year we find excuses as to why we should be wishing for the same one again for the forth year running. Like the cliche goes though, this year will be different. Actually wait, I'll be different this year.

H.